I Remember (Remembrance Series) Read online

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  I Remember

  Copyright © 2013 by Cynthia P. O’Neill

  All rights reserved.

  Edited By: Kim Swain, Red Line Editing

  Cover Design By: Once Upon A Time Covers

  Formatted by JT Formatting

  No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without the written permission of the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Discover other titles by Cynthia P. O’Neill at Amazon

  Table of Contents

  Prologue

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Chapter 34

  Chapter 35

  Chapter 36

  Chapter 37

  Chapter 38

  Chapter 39

  Chapter 40

  Chapter 41

  Chapter 42

  Chapter 43

  Chapter 44

  Chapter 45

  Chapter 46

  Chapter 47

  Chapter 48

  Chapter 49

  Chapter 50

  Chapter 51

  Acknowledgments

  About the Author

  – Benjamin Franklin

  I wandered along a path as the sun began to set across the horizon, lighting the sky with deep hues of orange, purple and pinks. I didn’t know where I was, but the countryside was simply breathtaking.

  “Angeline, where are you?” A familiar male voice called out.

  “Come find me, Daniel,” she announced playfully, in the distance.

  Finding no one else around, I decided to head their way to ask for directions.

  “Where are you hiding, my love? You know I will find you; and when I do, I will smother you with kisses,” he responded, full of laughter.

  Their voices led me to a beautiful meadow filled with spring flowers and the sound of a river in the distance. They were dressed in Victorian fare, running playfully until Daniel caught the girl who must have been Angeline. They fell to the ground together, laughing, near a tall tree.

  As I walked toward them, I watched Daniel lean in to kiss Angeline softly on the lips, her hands circling around his neck and pulling him closer. I stopped in my tracks feeling like I had invaded a private moment, but I still needed directions in order to return home.

  “Excuse me, I don’t mean to intrude but I could really use your help,” I stated softly, so not alarm them.

  They continued, without even a glance my way. How rude. I cleared my throat loudly and spoke again, but no answer.

  I was frustrated. How could they not hear me?

  Suddenly, the landscape began to twist and shift into something dark and evil. I tried to turn and run but found myself unable to move. My heart began beating erratically as fear set in.

  A tall figure appeared before me with ghostly shadows swirling and moaning around it. It was dressed in the darkest cloak I’d ever seen, with the hood draped in such a way as to cast shadows across the few visible areas of the face, making it impossible to see who or what it was.

  An arm rose revealing long willowy fingers, aged and deformed and pointed at me. A sadistic female voice bellowed, “I warn you. Do not seek him out! The prophecy must not come to pass. If you defy me, I will make your life a living hell, taking all that you hold dear.”

  That’s when the figure’s head tilted up and her glowing red eyes locked onto mine, sending a chill down my spine. Then the shadows began to swirl around my body, suffocating me.

  “STOP!” The scream came from nowhere, catching me by surprise.

  “LEAVE HER ALONE!” This time I recognized a man’s voice.

  One of the shadows grabbed my arm and a piercing, “NOOOO” sounded, from deep within my chest, echoing off all that was around me.

  My eyes shot open, as I bolted upright in bed. I looked around and realized I was in my bedroom.

  I reached for the light. Turning it on, I tried to catch my breath. My only thought was that the dreams were back and they were worse. I’d seen a witch spirit previously, but not to this extent.

  Wrapping my arms around my chest to calm myself, I felt a sharp pain on my right arm. I looked down to see the reddened hand print, where the dark shadow had grabbed me, slowly fading from existence. What the heck?

  “Can we talk about the possibility of forever?”

  I shook my head a couple times and blinked my eyes, to see if I was imagining things. The same words that I had seen in my dreams were staring back at me from my computer monitor, the cursor blinking, begging for a reply.

  After work, I decided to go online; needing something to keep my mind occupied, while I waited for my mother’s phone call with updates on my father’s deteriorating health. The doctors had not been able to determine why his strength and weight were rapidly declining; only that something was amiss. My mind was filled with trepidation, dreading the latest news.

  The login was complete announcing, “You Have Mail.” I was pretty sure it would be from Thomas. He had been sending me messages in response to a personal ad I had posted, trying to persuade me to go out with him on Valentine’s Day. The idea had some appeal, but an inner voice kept warning me not to accept.

  I was about to read his latest efforts to influence me when a ping alerted me to an instant message. I clicked on the link and opened the box to find those words that were still awaiting my reply, “Can we talk about the possibility of forever?”

  The message came from RileyG786. I knew I had never talked with this person before, but an odd sense of déjà vu prompted me to respond back. “Do I know you?” I finally typed.

  The response was instantaneous, “No, but I just read your personal ad and noticed you were online. I would rather chat directly than via email, if that’s ok?”

  I detested the idea of posting a personal ad, not wanting to resort to such tactics. But my family, friends and co-workers persisted, noting that I was married to my job and had little time for a social life. My life was fine that way it was; a nice job, shared an apartment with a wonderful friend, had a mom and dad who loved me. What more did I need?

  I was actually surprised by the responses I had received. I was up front and bold in the description of myself, not hiding my strong personality and desire for only a friendship, nothing more. I even created a screen name that was meant to ward off most, Braveheart. I recalled my ad:

  “I have a dream of finding a true friend to share common intere
sts, similar likes / dislikes, one who I can trust with my thoughts and my soul. I am a SWPF (single white professional female), age 21, 5’6”, average weight, long curly/wavy brown hair, natural golden/red highlights, emerald green eyes, and fair complexion. I do not smoke, rarely drink, and don’t believe in drugs or unhealthy lifestyles. My likes include most music spanning from classical to current music. I prefer movies that are romantic comedies, dramas, classic romances and limited science fiction. My tastes in food are eclectic; I prefer healthy styles of eating. I do not like people who are fake. I cherish honesty and boldness. I am a strong-willed individual who can be utterly shy at times! I am married to my job and am not seeking a relationship. Friendship is all I dream of, though for the right guy, I might be open to the future of possibilities.”

  I looked at the clock, noting that I still had plenty of time before Mom’s call. In curiosity I replied, “I have a moment. What did you want to talk about?”

  “My name is Gregory. Some people try to call me Greg, but I prefer Gregory. I wanted to talk to you about the possibility of finding forever…with me.” His response sent a rush of adrenaline coursing through me, bringing visions of similar conversations from dreams past.

  He had given his name, which surprised me since most guys would not provide a name until a few emails or phone calls later.

  I hesitated, but soon typed, “Hi Gregory. I’m Jordan.” I couldn’t believe I just gave in like that, not allowing for any mystery.

  “Your name is lovely, Jordan.”

  I knew my mother would be calling soon, but I wanted to continue our conversation. I finally admitted, “Normally I would welcome the opportunity to chat, since I need a good conversation right now. But, I am waiting on a vital phone call and need to go, soon.” I knew saying that would probably turn him away, but I hoped that he would take me at my word.

  “If it is ok to ask, why do you have to go? Couldn’t you spare just a few minutes?” He questioned.

  Curiosity was definitely in his response. I stayed on, wanting to make sure that he was not offended; but I also worried about giving him too much information too quickly.

  “It’s a long story, but here is the gist of it….my dad’s health has been declining over the past week and I am worried. The doctor has no idea why. My mom has been calling with daily updates on his condition around this same time every night. I just happened to be home early from work tonight, and needed to pass the time while I waited for her call.”

  He probably thought I was trying to ditch him. I just had to hope that he would want to talk, later.

  After a couple of minutes with no response, I realized circumstances were not favorable to starting a friendship, right now. I shouldn’t care; but for some strange reason, I did. The feeling of an intense connection with Gregory had not escaped me and only made me more compelled to get to know him.

  This was my life. Never an opportune moment to start a relationship or even a friendship with a guy. I guess that is why I accepted being alone so willingly.

  I was about to end the internet session when another message came across the screen.

  “I’m very sorry to hear of your dad’s health. I hope he will be just fine. Since we cannot talk, would you mind if I wrote you an email response to your ad? Maybe set up a time to message each other another night?”

  I couldn’t believe he still wanted to continue. In the past, when circumstances prevented me from going out or talking, most potential suitors took it as my being uninterested. I wondered if Gregory was serious or just being polite and if this would be our last conversation.

  “That would be fine. I will try to check my email later, tonight. It is nice to meet you, Gregory.”

  His reply came quicker this time, “Ok, Jordan, I will start writing my response and hope to catch you another time. Hope your call goes well and that I will be able to chat with you, soon.”

  ”Ok, sounds good. Bye for now.” I logged off completely, not waiting for his reply.

  I felt guilty for having to leave so soon; but within seconds, the phone rang and I ran to catch it, knowing it would be Mom.

  “How’s Dad today? I have been worried about both of you.”

  Mom responded in her ever patient and calm voice, although tonight I could sense uneasiness in her tone. “Your dad is weaker than yesterday, but still holding his own. I wish the tests were done, so we could know what’s going on. Today, I had to support his weight to walk him to the bathroom.”

  I instantly understood that she wanted me to know what was going on without alarming me. But, I was already on edge with concern; well past it, knowing things could not continue to decline.

  Over the past couple of weeks, Mom had taken my dad to the doctor several times; but he couldn’t find anything wrong other than a loss of appetite, weight loss and sudden weakness. He even had the audacity to ask Mom if she was feeding him!

  My mother would go to the ends of the Earth for my father; that is how deep their love is. She explained she was doing everything short of forcing food down his throat. But still, there were no answers.

  My father finally admitted he was having some difficulty swallowing food. Apparently this had been going on for several months, but he did not want to worry anyone. This was typical of him. He was born in the era where people dealt with issues quietly. He saw health issues as a sign of weakness.

  It took me a couple of moments to gain my composure before I could talk without feeling the need to burst into tears. “Mom, I don’t understand why the doctor cannot see how weak he’s getting. You do not need to be using all your strength to move him. Have you asked Dad if he would consider a quad cane or a walker to assist him, just until he gets steadier on his feet?”

  I knew the answer as soon as I asked.

  “I tried, but he wouldn’t listen. He considers it a sign of frailty.”

  “I know, Dad is stubborn and it’s like talking to a brick wall. But I wish he would realize he needs help.”

  “Exactly. But there is no changing his mind once it is made up.”

  “I know. Since he is so weak, how are you going to get him in and out of the car for the tests on Friday? Could they be done at the hospital, instead? I know it is a long shot, but I’m trying to think of easier options for both of you.”

  “I was wondering that, too. What would be the best way to approach the subject with both your dad and the doctor?” Mom sounded a bit desperate.

  “Mom, be honest with me. Do you need me to take a few days off and come up and help you with Dad?”

  “Jordan, I could use the assistance; but I know you don’t have the days accumulated to take off. Just tell me how you think I should deal with the doctor and let’s see what transpires from there. When I have a definite need for you, I’ll let you know. Ok?”

  Her words were very straightforward. I was always amazed at how she could go from extremely loving and caring to a steal quality of determination - a strength I was still trying to find within myself. But, I knew she had things handled, at least for now.

  “All right, when you need me, I’ll be there! As for the doctor, talk with his nurse, too. Ask them what they would do if this were their loved one. What would they want to happen? Usually, putting the shoe on the other foot helps them to see the seriousness of the situation. Let them know you will not sit idly by, waiting for something to happen to Dad.” I tried to think of other options, but my head was still spinning with the new information of tonight’s conversation.

  “If they don’t bend, what’s next?”

  “I don’t know, Mom. But his loss of strength and weight concerns me. Call me at work and let me know what they say. I was sure that my work would not mind me getting a personal phone call, considering the nature of the matter was a family emergency!

  “Ok, I’ll call the doctor’s office first thing, tomorrow.” Her voice sounded skeptical; but I knew when she got determined, she could make someone hear what needed to be said.

  “If the
doctor won’t listen, then we can brainstorm about other options. I will talk with some of our doctors at work to see what their thoughts are.” At that moment, I felt thankful to be working for a multi-specialty practice with every type of doctor under the same roof.

  “So, how was your day, today?” Mom shifted the conversation.

  “It was good. The manager was nice enough to let me work through lunch so I could get home early.

  “Alley is working an extra shift, tonight so she’s not home yet. I was on the computer earlier, to check my email and I got a letter from Thomas. He wants a date for Valentine’s Day, but I’m not sure how to respond.

  “I had someone new instant message me, wanting to talk. Naturally, at the worst time possible for me to try to find friendship, or even romance, people start responding.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh at the last part. Sometimes I wondered if I wasn’t more suited for another period of time. I’ll never fit the mold that today’s society seemed to follow; instead, identifying more with the lifestyle of the late 1800’s and early 1900’s.

  I often dreamt of myself in different attire, reflecting various periods throughout time. More so, lately. I have seen myself in Victorian dress, similar to Anne of Green Gables and occasionally in attire reminiscent of The Great Gatsby. I even recall being dressed like the people in The Rebels. Whenever I read historical fiction, I love to imagine myself as part of the story. Is it all just dreams? It seems so real.

  “Jordan, when it comes to friendship, or even love, the timing doesn’t have to be perfect and it should not matter. It will find you, no matter what’s going on in your life. Just look at your dad and I.”

  She was right. Fate would do what it wanted and nothing could fight it. My parents were proof of that, with their fifteen year age difference.

  There was silence for a minute before she spoke, again. “I need to go. Your dad needs help getting on his pajamas. Don’t worry about anything; just pray about it and ask that everything will turn out just fine. I’ll call you in the morning with whatever news I have. We both love you very much!”